Home > Christianity, Church, community, Jesus, Spiritual formation > Single Men and the Church

Single Men and the Church

A few days ago I wrote a post on why single men should serve in the church nursery. You can find it – here.

I generally don’t like to be a creator of conflict, and I do resonate with the majority of what Mark Driscoll wrote about single men serving in the church nursery. And one of my good friends, a pastor in Orange County wondered about why I had such a hard time with that one part of what was overall a good call to service in the church.

And so I began to think about how I would encourage single men to be involved in the church. And it really depends on the age of the man – so below I list a few of the ways I think it is good for single men to engage the church, and do so by age group. As someone in my low 30s, I’ll only cover the ages I know:

15-18 year old

– Be active in Sunday school and youth group. Invite your friends to events. Ask your youth pastor to help plan and or teach during one Sunday morning.

– Find a way to use your gift (music? art? connecting with children? numbers? greeting people?) and ask someone if there would be a chance to use that gift. Be open to how it would fit within the overall design of the service.

– Help with Vacation Bible School or summer camp – be a counselor (be a hero!) for a group of kids for one week in order to learn from them about how to see the world


– In addition to the above, seek someone in the church to be your mentor. It will most likely mean you have to be proactive in finding someone and asking them.

– Whether or not you are in college, you are beginning to find things that really make your heart sing. Look for ways to focus on that one thing. Let go of your desire to do all things (this is a disease!) just because you think you can do them. Find one thing and live into that.

– When you agree to do something, show up for it. People expect young men to be inconsistent. Destroy their expectations by being there when you should be there.


– Join a committee that meet regularly and helps make the church run smoothly. Be someone who is good at listening, provides perspective, learns from those who have been alive longer than you and find times to push back a little.

– Teach Sunday School for a group of boys. Aim for 5th grade or higher, areas that are usually lacking for teachers.

– Volunteer for the youth group.

– Volunteer to mentor a high school boy.

These are just a few ideas – what are some more you might have? The church needs people who don’t primarily look to be fed but who look to serve the church and its community in any way it can.

Learn how to serve selflessly, for the church, the bride of Christ. It is not just something nice to do – it is part of our calling if we are serious about following Jesus Christ into the world.

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