Home > Christianity, Church, community, Spiritual formation > Talking to a Girl…

Talking to a Girl…

This morning I witnessed a small interaction with implications far greater than I can imagine. I need others to experience it, because I think it is too important to let it pass.

It was, by all accounts, a normal morning. The kids were alternating between yelling in anger at other people (parents, especially) and yelling in joy at the fun they were having together. All together now:

I yell at you, you mean person.

I yell with you, you fun person.


And within all of this craziness a small conversation happened. So small, in fact, that I should have missed it for all the other noise that was happening.

It happened between my 2 year old daughter and my wife. And it went like this:

Daughter: I need to brush my hair so I can be beautiful.

Wife/Mom: Do you mean you need to brush your hair to make it look nice?

Daughter: No, I need to brush so I can look beautiful.

Wife/Mom: You were created by God, which means you are always beautiful. Combing your hair might make you look nice, but it does not change your beauty.


Later today I ran across this article about the importance of our interactions with kids, especially the things we note when we first meet them/see them. It is an excellent reminder that what we audibly notice about children creates a particular lens though which they begin to see themselves and the world.

And our culture already has enough issues with “ideal” images that enslave us, that mock us, that set before us unrealistic expectations of who or what we should be or look like.


I’m thankful that the message my daughter is receiving is one that is different than what the world might tell her. And I’m fearful that I will continue to fall into the trap of noticing and commenting on what the world has taught me to notice and comment upon.

May we be people who rehearse the truth – that because we are created in the Image of God we are beautiful, we are beloved, we are worthy. And that whatever our physical appearance may be, our value is based on something else entirely.

Oh, and case you need a song to remind you of this…click here.

  1. December 5, 2011 at 4:03 PM

    Beautiful reminder of how important it is to speak REAL truth to children. I often find myself guilty of commenting on a child’s outer appearance. In my head, what I’m doing is simply recognizing that child, trying to engage, and finding that commenting on their beauty (or their clothes) is a simple way to acknowledge them. I need to work harder at asking deeper questions or saying more meaningful commentary about their behavior/God-given gifts, even in those brief interactions. Thanks Jamie.

  2. December 5, 2011 at 4:41 PM

    Good words, Michelle. You are a great example of noticing deeper things about children – I hear you do it often. Thank you.

  3. December 5, 2011 at 7:38 PM

    Thank-you Jamie for your words, for sharing Erin’s word to Esther.
    We all need reminders of this. We are HIS creation.

    Love your sharing.


  4. December 5, 2011 at 9:37 PM

    Wow, it starts so early! That’s incredible. Nice work, Erin, though! Thanks for sharing with us, Jamie.

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